Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
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