so explain again why im purple
no
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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