Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
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