I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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