So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
