Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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