you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
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