I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
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