I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now