I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
