New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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