She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
