Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
