party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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