drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
