i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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