I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize