"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
