How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
