Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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