lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
