I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
