why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
You made out with two different species that night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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