I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
