I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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