I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
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