Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
