I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize