he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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