I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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