Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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