i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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