I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize