guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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