I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
North Korea, Best Korea!
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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