me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
