if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Is it because I queefed?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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