i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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