I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Randomize