when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
