How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
My vagina just clenched in fear
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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