No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
