im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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