She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
