I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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