I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Randomize
