so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
She bit a glass in half.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize
