He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
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