the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
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Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
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If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
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