what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize