how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Randomize
