i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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